61. From Defeated to Empowered: Take Radical Ownership in Perimenopause

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Feeling stuck, exhausted, or like your body is working against you in midlife? This episode is your tough-love wake-up call, because thriving in perimenopause starts with radical ownership.

I’m breaking down the patterns that keep women overwhelmed, inflamed, and waiting for “someday”, and offering a powerful invitation to take back your time, energy, and mindset–starting now.

In this episode, I cover:

Why overwhelm is often a choice–and how to change it
The hidden cost of people-pleasing and lack of boundaries
How social media might be draining your energy and self-worth
Common mindset traps that sabotage long-term progress
What it really means to choose progress over perfection
A powerful metaphor that will shift how you spend your time

Today’s episode might ruffle some feathers—but it’s coming from a place of love and deep respect for women like you who are tired of feeling stuck, overwhelmed, inflamed, and like your body is running on empty.
Something to know about me – I can be incredibly compassionate, I will cry with you, but I will not let you stay stuck. I became a coach because I have a gift – to inspire others to live the life they say they want. And I truly believe that it starts with prioritizing your health & wellbeing.

This Is Your Wake-Up Call

Think of this episode as your wake-up call. I’m gonna talk to you like I would a friend or my sister—someone I care about deeply—who needs some tough love.
If you want to thrive in midlife, it’s time to stop giving away your power. No more waiting for the perfect time. No more blaming your hormones for everything. Or your doctor. Or your kids. Or your partner. Or the government. Or your negative life experiences. No more excuses.

Radical Ownership

THIS is about taking ownership. It’s about creating boundaries. It’s about showing up for yourself—even when it’s hard, even when you’re tired, even when you’re busy, even when every excuse feels valid.
This isn’t about pushing through when you truly need rest. But it is about finally prioritizing yourself in ways you maybe never have before. Because you didn’t think you deserved it.
So buckle up, my friend, because I’m bringing some much-needed tough love today. We’re talking about what it really takes to create the life you say you want.
Because I believe you deserve to feel amazing—not just someday, but now and for the long haul. And that starts with radical ownership of your time, your energy, and your mindset.

Common Patterns That Keep You Stuck

Here’s a breakdown of some patterns I see all the time in women:

The Overwhelm Trap

Let’s start with overwhelm. In my opinion? It’s often a choice. It’s not just that you have too much on your plate—it’s that you refuse to take anything off of it. You keep saying yes to things that drain you, then wonder why you’re exhausted.

The Constant “Yes”

Next is the constant yes to everyone and everything. If you’re honest, it’s people-pleasing. It’s a need to feel loved, needed, or validated. But every time you say yes to someone else at the expense of yourself, you’re saying no to your own healing.

The Scroll Spiral

Another big one? Social media. I see how many of you watch every single one of my stories—and while I appreciate the engagement, it doesn’t make me happy to know you’re likely using social media to numb out. You scroll to escape, to distract, to avoid.

The Give-Up Mentality

And finally–this one’s big: falling off track. One hard day or one “off” week and you give up on your own goals. You throw in the towel, spiral into guilt, and tell yourself you’ll start fresh next week or next month.

You’re Not Broken—But You Might Be Stuck

These patterns don’t make you weak; they make you human. But staying stuck in them – that is a choice—and one you don’t have to keep making.
Look…life is hard. Especially nowadays. You’re overwhelmed, exhausted, worried about finances, your kids, and probably feel like you’re drowning.
Perimenopause is hard. I say it all the time. It’s why I do this work.
Your hormones are shifting, and that brings very real symptoms. But you’re not broken. You have more control than you’ve been led to believe.

It’s Time To Be Honest With Yourself

And while there are incredible providers and coaches like myself, we can’t do the work for you unfortunately. We can guide you, support you, but YOU are the only one who can create the change you desire.
I wish there was an easy button, but there isn’t. The good news is: you don’t have to do it alone–but you do have to be honest with yourself.

Because chances are, you’re stuck in patterns that no longer serve you. Like…

an all-or-nothing mindset.
being impatient with the process, thinking you should get results in a few months, when you’ve been neglecting yourself for years.
you believe health can be found in a supplement bottle.
and you haven’t stopped to actually look at your life—to see where you’re bleeding energy, where you’re stuck in victim mode, where you’re holding on to old stories, and where you might be creating your own stress.

Molly’s Wisdom: You Only Get So Much Sand

So, I had a mentor named Molly who passed away a few years ago. She was a redhead with a Southern drawl, serious, grounded, and carried a lot of grief in her own life. But she made it her mission to help others rise.
One thing she said to me has never left me:
“Claudia, think of your life as an hourglass. There’s a finite amount of sand. How are you using your sand each and every day?”

That question stopped me in my tracks. Because we all live like we have unlimited time. We wait. We put ourselves last. And yet, so many of the things we spend our energy worrying about…they don’t really matter.

How To Start Changing Your Life

So what’s the first step?

Shift Your Focus

Stop obsessing over everything that’s wrong and start practicing gratitude—for your life, for your body, and what it has carried you through.

Set Real Boundaries

Not walls. Not cutting people off. But clear, kind communication about what you need and what you won’t tolerate anymore.

Progress Over Perfection

Tiny, consistent shifts result in massive long-term change. Stop chasing quick fixes.

Prioritize Daily Time For You

Daily time for yourself is non-negotiable. Not a luxury. It’s a requirement.

Show Up—Even When It’s Messy

Because messy action is still action. And it matters.

Get Support

You don’t have to do this alone. But you do have to show up and stay in it, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Final Thoughts + Your Invitation

I’ll close with this – you are so much stronger than you think. You have more power than you realize. If you want to thrive, it’s time to stop waiting and making excuses.

Start choosing yourself—every day.

And if you’re listening to this on Wednesday April 30th, today’s the last day to join The Perimenopause Method for this round.

If this episode lit a fire in you…don’t let it fade. This is your invitation to stop going it alone and start doing the deep work—with support, structure, and a plan that’s actually built for this season of life.

Doors close tonight. Go to the link in the show notes to get started.

⏰Today’s the final day to join The Perimenopause Method – enrollment closes TONIGHT!

Claudia Petrilli is a Functional Health Coach, Integrative Nutrition Coach, Women’s Health Educator, and creator of The Perimenopause Method. Having experienced debilitating periods, digestive issues, a sluggish thyroid, a pituitary tumor, and perimenopause symptoms in her late 30s, she knows exactly what it’s like to get dismissed by doctors and spend years searching for answers.

After making the decision to advocate for her health years ago and investing in her education, she changed her life. Now, she’s changing the lives of countless women by teaching them to advocate for themselves and improve their hormone health, so they can feel and look their best — in their 40s and beyond!

When she’s not digging into client cases and learning about women’s health, you’ll find Claudia with her life partner of 15 years, Mike, and their rescue pup, Dawson, the love of their life.